Tesco's Taste Discoveries

My Experience

So feeling good from their high protein lineup, the Taste Discoveries looked interesting, and oh boy...

Let's start with the absolute cardinal sin, the foundational failure that torpedoed this meal before it even got going: the rice. Tesco, my dear Watson, why are you using LONG GRAIN RICE in a dish meant to evoke East Asian cuisine?! It's just... wrong. Fundamentally wrong. Fried rice, especially Korean-inspired, needs a shorter grain that holds its own, offering the right texture. Using long grain here is just lazy, it's cheap, and frankly, it's insulting to the dish they're trying to replicate. This alone knocked off hypothetical stars before I even tasted it.

But oh, it gets worse. The packaging proudly proclaims a "spicy medley of vegetables." A medley, you say? I must have gotten the minimalist version because, after a thorough excavation, I unearthed precisely ONE (1) solitary, miserable scrap of cabbage. One piece! Where were the other vegetables hiding? Did they flee the oily crime scene? I know Tesco got plenty of carrots and sweetcorns laying around!

Now, credit where it's arguably due: they did manage the "fiery" part. There's definitely a kick of spice here. If heat is all you care about, maybe you'll find a flicker of something positive. But that flicker is immediately extinguished by the texture and the grease.

The rice wasn't just the wrong type; it was horribly cooked, managing the unholy paradox of being bone dry while simultaneously swimming in oil. Seriously, the amount of grease was offensive. It didn't coat the rice appealingly; it saturated it, creating this heavy, cloying mouthfeel that somehow amplified the dryness of the individual grains. It was genuinely unpleasant to eat.